Top of the Pops follow up.

Since noone besides Ramsey played my awesome song game, (ya bunch of jerks...) I decided to tell you the songs anyway. Because its 2:30am and I can't sleep.

1-I want your love I don't wanna be friends
Bad Romance-Lady Gaga

2-Just in time, I'm so glad you have a one-track mind like me
You gave my life direction, a game show love connection we can't deny
Hey Soul Sister-Train

3-Took my heart to the limit, and this is where I'll stay
Meet Me Half Way-Black Eyes Peas

4-2 + 2, I'm gonna undress you
Hotel Song-Pitbull

5-I forgot to say out loud, how beautiful you really are to me
Don't Leave Me-Pink

6-Just let it be, come on and bring your body next to me
Down-Jay Sean

7-I feel so untouched and I want you so much
Untouched-The Veronicas

8-You'll never have to be alone I love you and that's all I really know
I talked to your dad go pick out a white dress
Love Story-Taylor Swift

9-I'm your biggest fan, I'll follow you until you love me
Paparazzi-Lady Gaga

10-My momma told me don’t lose you, cause the best luck I had was you
Say Hey I Love You-Michael Franti

11-I know that we’ll have a ball, if we get down, and go out and just loose it all
Tonight's Gonna Be A Good Night-Black Eyes Peas

12-You come along because I love your face and I'll admire your expensive taste
New Perspective-Panic At The Disco

13-Cause when the roof caved in and the truth came out I just didn't know what to do
but, when I become a star we'll be living so large I'll do anything for you
What'cha Say- Jason DeRulo

14-I know that I've got issues, But you're pretty messed up too
My Life Would Suck Without You-Kelly Clarkson

15-These streets will make you feel brand new, Big lights will inspire you
Empire State of Mind-Jay Z w/ Alica Keys

16-But it doesn't matter cause I’m packing plastic and that’s what makes my life so fucking fantastic
The Fear-Lily Allen

17-If it's not forever, if it's just tonight, Oh, it's still the greatest, the greatest
Sex On Fire- Kings Of Leon

18-If you have the last hands that I want to hold Then I know I've got to let them go
Maybe-Ingrid Michaelson

19-Clouds filled with stars cover the skies
Sweet Dreams-Beyonce

20-My heart beat beats me senselessly Why's everything got to be so intense with me
Kelly Clarkson-Long Shot

*NOTE* I am aware some of these songs came out in 2008, but they were big in my life this year, so I included them. :)

Words of '09

According to some stupid facebook app, these are my top words of 2009. It really shows where prorties lie.



Your Top Used Words
And the results are:

1): work - used 18 times
2): happy - used 18 times
3): rsl - used 18 times
4): game - used 18 times
5): thinks - used 18 times
6): today - used 16 times
7): tonight - used 15 times
8): really - used 14 times
9): cup - used 12 times
10): home - used 12 times

Goodnight and Go

OK, I've always loved Imogen Heap. I think she is amazing. But somehow, In teh past I missed this song. But its totally amazing.





Say goodnight and go

Skipping beats, flashing jeeps
I am struggling
Daydreaming, been sitting, the corner cafe
And I'm left in bits, recovered tectonic, trembling
You get me everytime

Why'd you have to be so cute
It's impossible to ignore you
Must you make me laugh so much
It's bad enough we get along so well
Say goodnight and go

Follow you home
You've got your headphones on
And your dancing
Got lucky, beautiful shot
You're taking everything off

Watch the curtains, wide open
And you fall in the same routine
Flicking through the TV
Relaxed and reclining
And you think you're alone

Oh why'd you have to be so cute
It's impossible to ignore you
Must you make me laugh so much
It's bad enough we get along so well
Say goodnight and go

One of these days
You'll miss your train, and come stay with me
It's always say goodnight and go
We'll have drinks and talk about things
And any excuse to stay awake with you
You'd sleep here, I'd sleep there
But then the heating may be down again
At my convenience
We'd be good, we'd be great together
Go

Why'd you have to be so cute
It's impossible to ignore you
Must you make me laugh so much
It's bad enough we get along so well
Say goodnight and go

Why is it always, always

Goodnight and Go

Goodnight and Go!

I'll be home for Christmas....

One of the few things I do love about Christmas time is that so many friends who I love come back to visit!
Monday night I was lucky enough to head down to Red Door to have a round of drinks with Rachel(aka the best thing I got out of Strategic Staffing) and some of her best gal pals.(who are all fabulous!) It was so fun getting to see everyone and catch up over a delicious drink i am in love with called the Monkey Love. Sooooo Yummy.


Wednesday night I first met uo with Pinky to do some Sundance planning then headed down to the Beerhive to meet up with Derek, Trixi, Kevin and Nate. Nate I haven't seen in forever and I always love to get as much Derek time in as possible.

I hoping to catch up with a few more out of towners this weekend too!
MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!
Also, There is one Christmas song I love so much. Every time I hear it I get chills. Here is some random video someone made with the music enjoy :)

Me and My Roommates

OMG. What a freaking crowded house I moved into! Holy cow! I think it will be for the best. I really want to pay my credit cards down, and be able to take a few trips this year, this will defiantly help! Now, a quick run down of my roommates:


My mother.
Yes, I regressed and had to move back in with her. Just think of all the money I'll save! Wah wah. Cynthia said its okay to Regress during a Recession. Plus, it could be worse the married couple across from me are moving back in with her parents. That's worse right? RIGHT?!?! FML

Miss Elphaba
Elphie is a good roommate. Shes quiet, sleeps a lot and generally stays out of every ones way.


Carrie Bradshaw
Not going to lie, this girl is kind of a bitch. She keeps hissing at everyone, stealing their food and slapping them. Not cool.

Diego Luna
He is so sweet and handsome. I just wish he would come out from under the bed.

Phebee
She is great, loving, kind, and a dear friend. I hoping she can convince Diego out from under the bed.

In other news, moving fucking sucks. My whole body hurts and I'm exhausted.

KB5 for the Ladies

So since people (and by people I mean Ramsey) have been asking me for pics of the KB5 womans stuff I thought I'd put them here. Thanks all!

So this is Christmas...

Well, it looks like its almost Christmas. The Holiday season is definitely upon us.
Usually I feel at least a hint of the Christmas spirit, but this year not one bit. There has been so much going on this year I haven't had time to do anything fun and Christmissy. December is possibly the worst month to try and move. Like there is not enough stress going on already. So many things have gone awry this month its crazy. Money is the root of all evil(and happiness) and its totally destroying my life. I am so excited for the New Year I feel like its going to be a great fresh new start. I'm starting school and I'm moving in with my mom. Now I just need to find another part time job then we will be set. I'm so excited for Sundance and for my friends to start getting back into town. 2009 was a bit on the rough side and I'm glad its about to wrap up. And I know I say it a lot, but EVERYTHING DOES HAPPEN FOR A REASON. The reasons are not always obvious at the time, but when they finally reveal themselves it can be quite awesome. As much as it hurt to lose someone I was so close to for so long, I gained some amazing people in my life at the same time, and they are truly a blessing. Lots of love this Holiday season everyone. XOXO

Enjoy

Love this dude, love this song, hate his hair.

Top of the Pops

Bonjour. I wanted to a top songs of the year post, but I thought it would be fun to make a game out of it. So I'll put my fave lyric and you people can comment what songs they are. Then tomorrow I'll reveal the songs. Sound fun? I think so. So do it. Thanks. :)
PS NO CHEATING! Don't just google the lyrics.


1-I want your love I don't wanna be friends

2-Just in time, I'm so glad you have a one-track mind like me
You gave my life direction, a game show love connection we can't deny

3-Took my heart to the limit, and this is where I'll stay

4-2 + 2, I'm gonna undress you

5-I forgot to say out loud, how beautiful you really are to me

6-Just let it be, come on and bring your body next to me

7-I feel so untouched and I want you so much

8-You'll never have to be alone I love you and that's all I really know
I talked to your dad go pick out a white dress

9-I'm your biggest fan, I'll follow you until you love me

10-My momma told me don’t lose you, cause the best luck I had was you

11-I know that we’ll have a ball, if we get down, and go out and just loose it all

12-You come along because I love your face and I'll admire your expensive taste

13-Cause when the roof caved in and the truth came out I just didn't know what to do
but, when I become a star we'll be living so large I'll do anything for you

14-I know that I've got issues, But you're pretty messed up too

15-These streets will make you feel brand new, Big lights will inspire you

16-But it doesn't matter cause I’m packing plastic and that’s what makes my life so fucking fantastic

17-If it's not forever, if it's just tonight, Oh, it's still the greatest, the greatest

18-If you have the last hands that I want to hold Then I know I've got to let them go

19-Clouds filled with stars cover the skies

20-My heart beat beats me senselessly Why's everything got to be so intense with me

*NOTE* I am aware some of these songs came out in 2008, but they were big in my life this year, so I included them. :)

Trixi's Lovely Baby Bump.

How cute is my adorable preggo friend? Trixi looks so cute I can't wait to meet her baby and become an Aunt!

Oh ya, you better believe when I call her I talk to the miniature too. I make her hold the phone right up to her belly. :)

MLS CUP WEEK!

Alright kids here are a few more pics from the week after we returned from Seattle. I have never been to so many parties in my life ever! It was crazy. I kinda felt like Brian always at a party. :)

Tuesday there was a big press conference at the Capital and the Governor declared it Real Salt Lake day!

Tuesday night Sandbar threw the boys a huge party and it was a total blast. Then even brought the cup down. Here is Becks, Mayra, Nick and I with the cup.

This is our friend Jay. He is such a great guy. We all have a great time when we all get together.

Special surprise guest Ciaran showed up for the party. It was great to catch up with him.

Here we are with Rachid and Ralphie. Rachid is probably one of the sweetest guys you could ever meet.

The girl in this photo is Kate and she is so freaking funny and adorable. The moment we met her Mayra and I decided we loved her.
Robbie and Tony are two super funniest nicest guys as well. Tony is so fun. He is just ridiculous.

This was at the Wednesday night party at some bar I have never been to before and will never return to. ha ha
Robbie and Clint are some of the sweetest guys ever. Ugh! I miss my friends. Come home now.

Seattle.

OK, I know I'm a bit behind, but I wanted to post some pics from Seattle. These are some of my fave moments from the trip.

One of the first things me and my mom did Friday in Seattle was go watch Seitzy do
the Fish Toss at Pike Place Market. It was so fun! I am going to miss him like crazy when he goes to play for the Philly Union, but I know he will be awesome.

This was taken Friday night when a group of us were in search of a bar called Kell's. This is called Post Alley and a big strip of wall here is covered in gum! In the Jennifer Aniston film "Love Happenes" they filmed some scenes here. So you bet I had to take a pic.

I wish you could see the sign behind us better, but it reads: "The Lusty Ladies We give raises" A-MAZ-ING. We had been walking in the rain for quite a bit to catch our bus home and the Lusty Lady happened to be right across from our bus stop. This was Saturday and Mayra had been in town about 3 hours and we had already mangered to get her drenched in Seattles finest rain. I'm so happy she was able to make the trip. I would of DIED without her!

This was taken at Gas Works Park on the day of MLS Cup. A lot of people did pub crawls and big parties that day, but I'm so thankful I got to have a quiet relaxing morning with some of the people I care most about in this world. :)

Derek and I have been friends for years now, and I am so thankful for his friendship. We have been through so much together, and he is honestly one of the greatest people you would be lucky to meet. I love him more then my luggage. We always take a piggy back picture, although, I have no idea why...

Troll under the bridge! This was my second trip to the troll, but Mayra and my mom had never been. At the time of our vist there were 25 plus girl scouts climbing all over said troll(which is a little weird considering homeless peeps sleep right behind the troll.) Luckly their troop leaders made them hide behind the troll so we could get a quick pic.

This was at the game after we had to get reseated. Wow. Not a great way to start the game. I love this pic of us. I was almost in tears right before this pic was taken, but I think we all look so nice. I love our smiles.

This was at the hotel right after the boys got back . Becks made as do the #1 thing.

Me and Dave at the after party.

Mayra and I got out hands on the cup! It was super heavy, and it took us forever but we finally got it! So neat!

This is me and my cute friend Allison at the after party after winning MLS cup! I have know Allison for a few years now, and love her to death! She is such a great girl.

Nothing's gonna change my world

Today I woke up mad as hell and I wasn't going to take it anymore. I was beyond mad. I wanted to punch the wall, break things, all in all I wanted to choke a bitch. I felt completely distraught over the fact that someone else's stupid choices were going to upset so many aspects of my life. Why should I have to lose my apartment? Why should I have to move? Why me. WHY ME?!?! Its not fair. I cried in the shower. I listened to loud angry music while driving to work. I wanted to tear my hair out. Then all of the sudden I saw it. Out of nowhere. Crossing the street with a dude on a skateboard. A dog wearing a red coat. And that's when it hit me. No matter what people do to hurt me, no matter how heart-broken I feel, no matter how much people betray me, somewhere, someone, will be putting clothes on their pet.
This made me think. If I move out of my apartment, I will lose a lot. Many things will change. I love my area. Its perfect. Close to everything. I don't want to leave but no matter where I live something will stay the same.

*I will still have the two best cats ever
*The boy I am crushing on will still have completely perfect teeth
*I will still walk outside and see beautiful mountains
*I will still be an aunt come February
*Starbucks will still make Chai
*I can still take yoga
*Gerber daises will still exist
*RENT will still be the best musical ever.
*I will still have amazingly great friends who even though I don't see them everyday, will sit on the phone with me for hours on the days I need to cry.
*Across the Universe will still be one of the best songs ever written.
*Brody Jenner will still be hot
*RSL will still be the 2009 MLS Cup Champions
*Coconut anything will still be the best.
*And there will still be dogs in red coats And if I'm really lucky maybe I will get to see them.

Are these things stupid? Yes. Probably. Absolutely.
I'm gasping for air trying to not lose my mind over this whole thing. Trying not to have a complete breakdown. I feel completely overwhelmed. Do I realize it could be worse? Absolutely. But it still sucks like hell so I'm trying everything to figure out how to make it.

Words are flying out like
endless rain into a paper cup
They slither while they pass
They slip away across the universe
Pools of sorrow waves of joy
are drifting thorough my open mind
Possessing and caressing me

Jai guru deva om
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world

Images of broken light which
dance before me like a million eyes
That call me on and on across the universe
Thoughts meander like a
restless wind inside a letter box
they tumble blindly as
they make their way across the universe

Jai guru deva om
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world

Sounds of laughter shades of life
are ringing through my open ears
exciting and inviting me
Limitless undying love which
shines around me like a million suns
It calls me on and on across the universe

Jai guru deva om
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Jai guru deva
Jai guru deva

The end.

Why is it the moment you feel things in your life are looking up, things are starting to go your way, everything comes crashing down?

Yesterday was an awful day. On top of a million other things I'm trying to deal with Hiba officially announced she is moving out. This comes as no surprise. I have been expecting this for quite sometime. But that doesn't make hearing it any easier. And it doesn't make the money aspect any easier either. I have absolutely no idea what to do. The easiest option seems to be to move back in with my mom. Unfortunately the very thought of this makes me lose the will to live. I love my mom. But, we get along much better when we don't live together. And Jesus Christ there would be FOUR cats in that one condo.

Besides that I have to deal with the offical lose of the person that used to be my best friend in the entire world. The person I could have fun doing anything with. The person who knew every gritty detail of my life. The person I always got pedicures with. The person who my family had over for holidays. The person who I could laugh for hours with. The person who made just sitting on the couch watching MTV the best part of my day. The one person who I completely believed I could trust with anything and who would always be by my side.

That person is gone. There have been many events lately that have showed me that the person I thought I could trust always, wasn't someone I could trust anymore. The person I thought I knew well, I didn't know at all. We've grown up. We've grown apart. Hiba is getting married to the love of her life. Someone I can't get along with. I've tried. I want her to be happy. I hope Andrew can make her happy forever. Yesterday she told me she wanted me to be her maid of honor still. I told her I can't.

I can not imagine, with all that's happened lately standing right along side someone on the most important day of their life and pretending to feel OK about it. I support Hiba in her choices 100 percent because of the friendship I used to have with her, but I can't promise to agree with them or help celebrate them. I can not imagine myself being involved in those very importanat wedding details. Throwing her a bridal shower. Helping her pick out dresses. Helping her get ready on the big day. I can't. I'm heart broken. This was not an easy choice, it was a horrible one. The worst. I didn't sleep at all last night. I hate this choice but I think it is the right one.

She thinks I've changed. I think we've both changed. I've been told her friends think I'm a stuck up brat. That I think I better then everyone. OK. Fine. So be it. It hurts my feelings to hear that people I once considered close to me say that, but if thats their opinion. They can have it. I can't feel sad about what others say about me. The Twitter and Facebook jabs are ridiculous and hurtful. The tears have to stop. I spent two months crying over the lose of my best friend. I can't do it anymore. At some point I had to wake up and say, OK. Enough is enough. You have to move on. You can't cry forever. So I did. As certain people in my life pushed me away, others pulled me closer. I'm not a bad guy. Neither is Hiba. There is only so long you can fight for something till you have to give up. No matter how bad it hurts or how bad you miss someone. My life is changing in a lot of ways. Hopefully for the better.

Hiba thinks it will help our friendship to move out, I don't. I am not mad at her for moving out. I am just incredibly sad about how things have gone with our friendship. I always thought when she got married , I would be there every step of the way. I thought I would love her husband. I thought our friendship could survive everything. I thought we would be best friends forever. I have so many amazing memories with Hiba. I will cherish them always.

Breathe Me
-Sia
Help, I have done it again
I have been here many times before
I hurt myself again today
And, the worst part is there's no-one else to blame

Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me
I am small
and needy
Warm me up
And breathe me

Ouch

I have lost myself again
Lost myself and I am nowhere to be found,
Yeah I think that I might break
Lost myself again and I feel unsafe

Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me
I am small
and needy
Warm me up
And breathe me

Until there's a cure...

December 1st is World AIDS day.

Actual reality act up fight AIDS!
Ways to help:
-Buy the Until There's A Cure bracelet. I've had mine since my Junior Year of high school. That's 12 years people.
-Visit Broadway Cares Equity Fights AIDS to get some Broadway stuff and help the cause!
-Vist (RED)
-GET TESTED!!!